IT HURTS WHERE IT FEELS

being underappreciated is a bummer. especially when the person you expect it from the most does it.

i dont know why but my heart is aching lately. i FEEL so LONELY. INVINSIBLE even. and it hurts. i dont know why i even bother with it. my conscious self exudes this jaded, cynical person when it comes to relationship, but i know that i'm bleeding inside -hurting where i feel. i expect too much, i give too much, then i get nothing in return. or maybe im expecting too much that i the little reciprocity directed my way is almost negligible.. regardless if its there or not, I STILL WANT MORE, I DESERVE MORE.

why does it hurt so bad? i know i can get over this but REJECTION is just TOO painful. the devil inside me is crying for attention - to go where i was before and live the reckless life i used to live just to numb away the pain, or seek to find the satisfaction that i long been looking for. the ANGEL in me is telling me to wait. what i would give to be RECKLESS right now.

SLEEP...maybe sleep will be my balm.